27 February 2010

So you no longer have to use your imagination

So, here's where I live:

The top floor on the right half of the building is my apartment, and my bedroom is the very far right window behind the palm tree. I'm in building 12. Please come stalk me.

Here's what my costume looks like:
Except it's less blurry in real life. I was in a hurry to get the photo taken, so this is the best I got for now. I prefer it over my Splash costume, although it's still not something in which I see myself getting hit on by guys. It hides my boobs and turns my entire body into one giant trunk in which I suddenly have junk.

Speaking of which, someone explain to me how Disney sizes work. My shirts are XS, my jacket is XXS, and my shorts and pants are size 14. FOURTEEN! I don't get the XS at all because I'm not THAT small - not with the poochy stomach I got from my mom's side and not with my chest region where I tend to be a C cup (well, my left boob is a C, and my right boob is a B and three-quarters. It's my Harry Potter boob.) However, I'm not a 14 either. But that's the only size pants I could get to fit around the smallest part of my waist, except I have enough room for another whole person in the legs. For whatever reason, these inexplicable sizing issues seem to only affect girls. Guys have no problem with Disney clothes fitting oddly other than needing to go up one size.

Anyway, here's what my side of the room looks like (barring the ghastly pink crap on the right. You all know how I feel about pink):

My prize possessions? My Epcot blanket, my Tomorrowland poster, and - my newest addition - my Splash Mountain canvas:


The photo doesn't do it justice, and while I was originally planning on getting another attractions poster like my Tomorrowland one, once I saw this, I just HAD. TO. HAVE. IT. So what if it's from the Disneyland version (one-across seating is a dead giveaway), it's muh Laughin' Place. I nearly got it in a poster as well, but to frame it would have cost a small fortune (my Tomorrowland frame was my main Christmas present this year), so I decided to pay a bit more and get a canvas which doesn't need a frame at all. Obviously I went with a smaller size this time. Since it was a canvas, it still cost me twice as much as my poster did by itself, but to get the canvas in the largest size would have cost me twice as much as what I paid for this medium sized canvas. Follow that? No? How about 2(Poster) = 1(Medium Canvas) = 1/2 (Large Canvas)? Okay, the poster was $30, the canvas was $60, and the larger canvas would have cost me somewhere around $120. I tried to be all modest and private about the cost, but I don't think I was explaining it well. ANYWAY. These prices were actually 50% with my Cast Member discount, which is the only reason I was able to ever afford these in the first place. I'm po'.

And in the future when I have my 16 babies, I'm gonna use the Tomorrowland poster in the boys' room and the Splash Mountain canvas in the girls' room and decorate them to match their respective themes. Always thinking ahead, I am. And always thinking with my uterus.

(If I don't scare the guys away with my costume, my uterus talk certainly will)

7 comments:

  1. big thumbs up for your side of the room, i'm with you on the down with pink stance.
    you look happy in your photo, or are you putting on a brave face for fear of reprisals?
    keep up the good work, one satisfied blog reader.

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  2. Ah hah! It all makes sense now! :)

    Cool to see this perspective on your life and good taste in artwork. The more I see it, the more I like canvas vs framed art, so thanks for the info there.

    This was definitely one of the funnier posts! Cheers and Best!

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  3. > If I don't scare the guys away with my costume

    Speaking as a guy, if I saw you dressed as above, I wouldn't hit on you ... but not because of the clothing, but because you appear to have a ring on the ring finger of your left hand (although maybe that's the mirror reversing things?).

    Speaking as a guy, I look at women in this order: face, chest, ring finger. If there's a ring, I stop looking.

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  4. @TJIC - that is indeed a trick of the mirror. I used to wear a promise ring on my left-hand ring finger, but I was tired of being mistaken for a married woman - I've since switched it to my index finger, although now I get, "You're wearing it on the wrong finger!" I just can't make ANYONE happy. Hmph. I'm just gonna buy ten rings, where one on each finger, and each time a man looks in my ring-finger direction, I'm just gonna say, "Guess."

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  5. Ah, good to know. If I ever met you not intermediated by a mirror, then, I'd feel free to hit on you. At least until I realized that you're about half my age, and I'd probably be arrested.

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  6. Eh, it wouldn't bother me. My last boyfriend was 12 years my senior. And it was the most successful relationship I'd ever been in. Right up until the end, anyway... ;)

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  7. Hmmm...well, you know, not ALL guys are freaked out by the idea of a house full of kids. Although 16 is a bit much. 12 or 13 sounds more plausible...

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