[Imported] No, really. You CAN trust me with your kids.

Today at the Y, I was with the K-5th graders, which I've learned to enjoy mainly because all I have to do is shout, "Who wants to play beauty shop?" and suddenly I have a flock of girls lining up to play with my hair.

(Psssst. Let me let you in on a little secret: play with my hair, and not only will I tell you my PIN number, I will personally hand over both my debit AND credit card and tell you to buy yourself something pretty.)

Anyway, a 10 year old boy (who came up to my nose, in terms of height) wanted to play Legos with a small group of 5 year old girls and boys (all of whom barely passed my belly button). Not 2 minutes after he joined them, he ran away from the group in tears. I asked him what was wrong, and he told me that the other kids were being mean to him. I'm sure I had the most stupefied look on my face upon hearing that, and even though I knew it was the most irresponsible thing for me to say, I couldn't stop myself. I perplexedly looked him right in the eye and said, "Seriously? You DO realize that you could beat up all four of them with one hand tied behind your back, right?"

Just goes to show you that I'm not perfect with kids. SUE ME. I'm sure that boy's mom will some day, right after he finishes beating up all the kids that aren't his own size. I mean, it was kind of my idea, after all.

Oh, and this is totally unrelated, but last Sunday, I straightened my hair (as I do almost everyday), but I forgot to turn it off the straightener before I left the house. You CANNOT imagine how far my stomach dropped when I came back SIX HOURS LATER to see that it was still on. I always worried that one day I would forget to turn it off, and now that I have, I can safely say that my subsequently-heighten level of paranoia will never let me do it again, as I now check my straightener no fewer than four times before I leave the house.

All I can say is that I am so lucky that my house did not burn down.

And since I live in a townhouse, so are my neighbors.